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The redundancy notice didn't arrive by letter. Nor was it flagged as a dreaded staff consultation ahead of a company restructure.
Instead, it came as a throwaway line in a conversation: "Just another old white bloke. Ignore him."
It shouldn't have stung. I'm sure the fellow who said it - who in life's blink of an eye will himself become an old white bloke - meant no harm. He wasn't referring to me. But sting it did. Being made to feel redundant - intentionally or not - always does.
I am, after all, an old white bloke. There's no escaping that. And there's no doubt some OWBs spout some unpalatable rubbish. But not all of them.
This casual dismissal of a whole cohort of people stopped me in my tracks. It granted a chilling insight into the suffocating cloak of invisibility too often forced on the aged. And it made me realise I'd also been thoughtlessly complicit in society's devaluing of its older members. I suspect most of us have.
We don't bother finding out the name of the grey-haired man down the street. His identity, his story, his hopes and fears are reduced to "old mate".
We fume impatiently behind the woman, likely a widow, counting out change at the checkout, eking out a precious moment of human contact in a life of loneliness.
We grudgingly surrender our bus seat to the bent-over man with the cane - or don't - but rarely smile or ask how his day is going. Striking up a conversation would take precious time away from the smartphone or interrupt the true crime podcast.
The legendary Nashville songwriter the late John Prine expressed it beautifully in his 1971 song Hello In There:
You know that old trees just grow stronger
And old rivers grow wilder every day
Old people just grow lonesome
Waiting for someone to say, "Hello in there, hello"
While our two major supermarket chains and other big retailers strip out human interaction and inflict self-checkouts on customers, Dutch company Jumbo has gone in the opposite direction. It trialled slow checkout lanes where sales assistants deliberately take their time scanning the groceries and chatting to customers. And the customers waiting for their turn chat with each other. The trial was so successful slow lanes have been rolled out to hundreds of Jumbo's supermarkets across The Netherlands.
In a past life, as the editor of a country paper, I assumed I'd drawn the short straw agreeing to accompany the local garden club on an excursion. I couldn't have been more wrong.
This group of retirees had fascinating stories to share from their working lives as company directors, scientists, doctors, architects and social activists. They also had a range of perspectives on the world in which they lived. I didn't agree with all of them but was enriched by listening. And I was energised for days by spending a few hours with a group of people I'd have reflexively crossed the road to avoid.
Mental health advocates warn Australia, like many other countries, is headed for an epidemic of loneliness, with one survey revealing more than half of us struggle with feelings of social isolation. Younger Australians are finding it particularly hard, according to Ending Loneliness Together. Japan has appointed a minister for loneliness to find solutions. Even the World Health Organisation has recognised loneliness as a health priority.
Beating the problem won't be simple but there are a couple of simple things we can do that might help.
Pull our beaks out of our smartphones is one. Dump the prejudice that a whole cohort of people isn't worth your time - you know, they should be seen and not heard - is another.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Is loneliness a problem in your life? Does our society devalue its older members? Has our push for inclusion bypassed the aged? Email us: echidna@theechidna.com.au
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IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Woolworths CEO Brad Banducci has resigned from the supermarket's top job amid criticism over his handling of difficult questions on price gouging during a Four Corners interview. Woolworths Group announced on February 21 that the CEO, who reportedly earned a pay package of $8.65 million in 2023, would step down in September 2024.
- Two of Australia's most popular mid-sized luxury SUVs, both engineered in Germany, have been found to have fuel consumption as much as 20 per cent higher than that claimed by the manufacturer. The latest round of federal government-sponsored "real world" fuel consumption and emissions tests have found that the BMW X3 exceeded the laboratory fuel test outcome by 20 per cent while the Audi Q5 was 17 per cent higher.
- Jailed Australian writer Yang Hengjun has made the "heartbreaking" decision not to appeal his suspended death sentence in a bid for life-saving medical treatment. Dr Yang was found guilty on espionage charges in China in February after spending five years in prison.
THEY SAID IT: "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty." - Mother Teresa
YOU SAID IT: Standing up to despots like Putin takes enormous courage. Yulia Navalny and Volodymyr Zellenskyy are exemplars.
Ian writes: "Alexei Navalny's courage and dedication to his country is staggering. Last night we watched the documentary about him on SBS and my wife kept on asking why he would return to Russia after the failed assassination attempt. His death was both shocking and predictable, showing the power Putin has over his country and his disregard for his reputation as a murderer, but also his fear of opposition. Trump also knows fear and seems to be afraid of Putin above all others, making me think that Putin has a dossier of Trump's misbehaviour and corruption that he will use to pull whatever strings are necessary to make Russia great again. The sooner Ukraine can prevail over Russia the better and the Western world should be doing whatever it can to support Zelenskyy."
"Volodymyr Zelenskyy and Julia Navalny are modern day heroes," writes Tony. "We all in the West must encourage, support and protect these heroes in the fight to oppose Putin. He is an evil beyond description. If he gains further traction because the West is hesitant, we will all suffer."
Julie says we've got it wrong: "Navalny was part of the CIA/MI6 interference trying to start another colour revolution in Russia as US does with countries that are rich in resources they covet. NATO expansion to Russia's borders caused the war. Imagine what would happen if China put weapons in Mexico and Canada. How do you think US would act?"
"The war in the Ukraine is not a lost cause," writes Jeanette. "American author H. Jackson Brown said: 'In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins, not through strength but by perseverance.'"
Arthur writes: "Donald Trump is as dangerous as Vladimir Putin, if not more so. If Trump is re-elected he will change the rules so he can remain president indefinitely just like Putin and Xi Jinping have done. It is time for the Republicans to wake up and realise what they are doing. Democracy in America is under serious threat. Trump uses the media to promote his megalomania. Putin lives in fear of publicity. Yulia Navalny's courage deserves the equivalent of the Victoria Cross. Her life expectancy is short."
"Biden, on the other hand, no longer remembers who Putin is, and probably never knew who Zelenskyy is," writes Murray. "It's easy to disparage Trump, but Putin would not have invaded Ukraine if he was in the White House. When they met, Putin said he wanted to annex Ukraine. Trump told him straight out, no, you can't do that. Things have gotten worse since then."
Helen writes: "I am very much afraid the war in Ukraine is a lost cause, but I hope and pray it isn't. It would be awful to see such courage and defiance against the Russian bullying fail when they have fought so hard. Zelenskyy has been a leader who was there at the right time. The support from the West should continue, despite the distraction of the current Israel-Palestine war."